Feeling sad, just for their attention?

 At night, I always imagine fake bittersweet scenarios just to sleep, and my social media just so happened to read my mind that hour. For example, I need a hug, hangout, mental awareness, etc. And I only think of that one single person, maybe my crush for example, would notice me. Now what if instead of a crush, someone I don't find interesting, including my current friends noticed it? Would that be not intimate?

This isn't about romance. It's all about relationships, especially on friendships. I always feel like not having friends even though I already have. I always get jealous if my friends were hanging out with other friends instead of me. And that's how that feeling came. Friends these days feel so fake, really fake, until negative comments feel real and honest. Like I would want to get roasted for ugly face and big ass. They were painful, but it's honest. It's like Stairway to Heaven and Highway to Hell. 

These feelings were like forcing me to want to have plans with them, even if it's a waste of money, energy, and free time. It's like "Mac is in his feelings and he can't get out of it".