Alone....

 Sorry if this entire blog is about me and relationships, or companionship. Really am I that obsessed to that only topic. Now into the topic.

I feel like I'm going crazy, insane, to the point that i need to see a therapist (even i read it like the rapist). These lonely feelings every Friday night are driving me crazy, as if I'm addicted to companionships. Ever since I was a kid, I was lonely. I made friends with the blue elephant and pillows. We had fun together when we went to sleep. 

It's grade 3. I don't really have a single friend. Well there's another lonely guy like me but I'm too shy to interact that time. At this point I got kicked out from a friend group due to a drama I caused. And just like that I was alone. I really hate breaks at school that year because I had to sit down with someone which they don't want me to sit with them. In grade 5 someone added me to a friend group then kicked me out because I don't fit in the group. 

So, now you know why I'm obsessed with that topic. 

So in the present, every time I feel lonely and I got nobody to talk with, I'd go insane with the overthinking and create horror movies in mind where I become a villain that destroys bad people that makes society worse. My coping mechanism, which is reels, journaling on my diary, and this blog, only helps a little. But you got family? Well they only care about themselves (this is what i think, i apologize). You know parents were bad at responding to rants. All they give is just the same advice over and over again.